Digest

We've enjoyed the feast, we've enjoyed the company and now the festive period is over. I hope you've enjoyed this experience and found it as enriching as I have. Put your feet up and let it digest.

The penultimate Match

It's like Xmas eve, the one before the main event. I feel that this one is potentially more important. We place too much importance on the main object, often the one before is more satisfying because were not setting ourselves up for it. Are you full? Do you feel satisfied? do you really need anymore?

I am satisfied, maybe I am being greedy. Maybe If I don't strike the final match we will be stuck in limbo together? Would you wait?

And then there were three

I have three matches left, three strikes and I'm out. I'm going to miss you, Will you think of me? Will you be relieved?

You haven't fallen asleep have you?

Have you Peaked?

why am I still here?

This performance has shown me the discipline that I have often lacked prior to this. I have never felt the sense of achievement in performance that I feel now as I am coming to the end of this journey. Stay a little longer, I've not finnished yet.

Have you Given up yet?

I'm still here. Well I'm still typing, I'm not sure how much of me is awake. my finger and thumb on my left hand are burned, I am grateful that I had nails to burn 1st. this is a dangerous place to be. I have a memory of Robin Williams in the film "What Dreams May Come." He has to go to meet his wife in limbo, he knows if he stays their for too long he will loose his mind...... that's where I am now.

worn down

I dont know what came over me, I became the over emotional drunk, an alcohol free drunk? it doesn't add up. I told you I was a social nightmare, I gave too much away....
I blame the lack of sleep. Do you feel embarrassed? should I stop? I'm not in the business of making people feel uncomfortable.
Well it's never my intention.

Its like that song "theres a hole in my bucket dear Liza." I'm the bucket, honesty just leakes out of me. It's like oil, people dont know how to deal with it.

Actually I meant every word. Do you still want to listen?

gifts

I didn't want chocolate oranges or CD's for Xmas this year. The best gifts are the ones you can't open. The ones that are there all year round. Maybe I found the clove this yeah or the coin. I guess it was there all along. Creativity and inspration are priceless.